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Are you a non-mom?
By sandi | May 10, 2008
NBC and Teleflora have decided to hold a contest to bring glory to all the moms out there. You can go to their site and nominate your mom. Wait … don’t rush over just yet. You would have to pick a category for your mom. Sure there are the traditional choices but there is also another—the non-mom. To my mind that would be the ever-helpful neighbor who is such a wonderful blessing to you or the mother’s helper you have who helps you out every time you need her, maybe even the full-time dad who is without a mother for his children, but never in a million years would I have expected to see them lump adoptive moms into that category.
Shocked? Yeah so was I. They recently released this statement:
Teleflora is immediately changing the name of our “Non-Mom” category to “Adopting Moms”. After closer examination, we can see how this may have been offensive to moms who have adopted children — moms who are indeed real moms to their children in every sense of the word. In fact, many of us at Teleflora are “adopting” parents ourselves, including our president and owner. The essence of this category still focuses on a grandparent, neighbor, step mom, or mom to adopted or foster children, each one raising and loving a child.
This show of insensitivity on our part was in no way intended and we deeply apologize for any concern or distress we may have caused. It was always our intent to salute and celebrate all moms.
WOW so they are for real that is the proper category they meant for adoptive parents. Picture me picking up my jaw off the floor and Bill laughing incredulously. What the heck is wrong with people.
On my first Mother’s Day I had recently suffered the loss of Elizabeth, Annie was barely conceived, and we did not yet know about Kimberly’s adoptive status. Even still I was no less of a mother, my baby wasn’t here on Earth with me but I was still her mother.
I spent many years being the non-mom with just dreams of kids. Suffering through infertility and not knowing if I ever would be a mom. I cannot imagine how they thought this wouldn’t be offensive.
The non-mom label strikes me at my core. #1 as an adoptive mother to one, soon to be two, I am just as much their mother as I am to my two biological children. #2 as an infertile woman who knows the pain of the passing of Mother’s Day with one more year without any hope of children. They didn’t specifically label them in this category but I am sure they would. #3 as a human. Anytime you suggest someone is non-anything you better know you are saying. That is a negative word and it means without. If I get something non-dairy it sure as heck better not have any dairy in it.
This is just one of those times that reminds me of all the insensitive things people do and say without thinking about it. It amazes me how ignorant people are about adoption.
Topics: Thoughts |
May 10th, 2008 at 12:18 pm
I know what you mean about suffering as a non-mom. To be re-placed into that category after so eagerly leaving it is horrible.
I told my husband about this last night and he was like “What the heck does ‘non-mom’ mean?”.
He was irked.
I’m glad they issued a statement like that and I hope in the future they think before they build a website around such an offensive concept.
Non-mom!!!!
Hmmpfhh
May 10th, 2008 at 4:26 pm
Wow, what an idiotic move on there part. It’s amazing nobody stopped that before it went public. Someone must have handed them a shovel to dig themselves even deeper with their “revision”. Their PR people will clearly be busy attempting damage control. I guess we can be their non-customers… do they have a category for those?
May 10th, 2008 at 4:27 pm
I noticed I changed my name in my post… Chris-it. LOL, I must be a non-speller…
May 10th, 2008 at 5:32 pm
I’m glad you did that, Christi! I was getting tired of correcting it every time. Heheh.
May 13th, 2008 at 7:36 am
Wow, shockingly idiotic. I agree, whoever they are, they are going to have lots of “non-customers”! Ha!!