I thought about my children and the impact this might have on them and I was overwhelmed with positive thoughts. I believe that this will show them the great value I place on life. I know if I, or anyone I loved, were the ones needing bone marrow I would want someone else to make this small sacrifice.

This is something I can do easily. My body hasn’t always been there for me when I needed it. It didn’t do things that normal bodies did, but it can do this. And someday it might be the match for someone and make a world of difference for them.

I know this isn’t for everybody, but I know this is for me.

We haven’t had a weekend without back to back parties in 3 weeks. that means we haven’t had a lazy pajama day on a weekend. We love having fun at the parties and celebrating so we can’t skip any.

Who knew with 4 kids you would have such a busy time with the parties. I sure didn’t anticipate this and Paul isn’t even in school yet. I would have to say keeping Annie and Kimberly in the same class is a good idea in order to not have more parties to attend.

I don’t want to seem like we don’t enjoy the parties, or love celebrating each friend’s day—we certainly do. Which is why we accept the invitation, pick a gift for the special child and attend the party. I am glad the children are so well liked by their peers.

I am sure the parties will ease up sometime soon, or at least I hope they will.

As soon as Kimberly started to tell me what she learned she got big tears in her eyes. She said, “and my little bro Paulie wouldn’t have had the same things as us.” “Mom, he would have to use dirty bathrooms and not ride on buses.” “He couldn’t go places we can.” She was hurt by the facts. I was hurt by the facts and the pain in her face.

Annie chimed in to tell me similar stories and was so choked up that she gave Paul a long hug. She wanted to know why people would do this in the first place. I took her in my arms and told her I didn’t have an answer. I cannot imagine thinking any different of any human based on the color of their skin. She shook her head and walked away.

They were so thankful to Dr. King for making all things possible for their brother. I too find myself in awe of his dreams of freedom for all people. She said she wanted to be like him and I just smiled. He had a dream and he made his life work achieving it. I can’t think of a better role model for my daughter.

A wise woman wrote this on her facebook status on Monday:

Thanks to the impossible dreams of giants before me, my dream of a family is now my reality. ~ Jill Catlett

Dr. King was born in 1929 in Georgia. He dreamed of a reality that seemed beyond possible, yet he achieved it. I hope my children will be filled with this sort of determination, whether it be for worldly ideas like Dr. King’s or meaningful personal goals like creating their family. The greatest of things come from the greatest trials.

Life is an amazing journey. For some reason I always felt I would adopt. Even as a young girl I dreamed of it. Adoption is one of those times in life where you really feel God moving in your life. (You can feel free to substitute God with the universe/fate or whatever floats your boat. For me it is God but I know it isn’t for everyone.) It was like that seed was planted deep inside of me and would grow when the time was right.

For me the time was right when infertility seemed like a road of no hope. Learning that no matter how hard I tried and how much I wanted to have a child that it was most likely out of my realm was hard. At that moment that seed began to sprout and grow. It insisted that we tell everyone and anyone that we were looking to adopt. That if someone heard of anyone that they would tell us. From all the pain of infertility and loss came hope in the form of Kimberly. She was the miracle we had been searching so long to find.

Years later after seven hazardous pregnancies and two scary births we found adoption once more. This time it was a son from Ethiopia. He was the one we had been waiting on to complete this family.

There isn’t a way to put into words how much of an impact adoption has on my life. It is like trying to explain how my beating heart has made my life great. My heart has made my life amazing because by beating it has allowed me to live. Adoption has made my life amazing because adoption has been in it. I am so glad that my life has been touched by this miracle.

I have some dear friends, Rick, Christi and Bella who are looking to complete their family through the adoption of a child. Each journey is so unique and for them their journey has brought them to the moment where they are looking to adopt a child domestically. On the face of it domestic adoption can seem so easy, there are so many children without homes and so many families waiting for a child, but it isn’t that easy. You have to wait until you find the perfect match. Much like dating to find the perfect spouse for yourself this too is a long process.

If you know of anyone who is looking to place their child for adoption please consider passing along their website. Help be part of their miracle of adoption.

I know many who come to this blog are adoptive* parents themselves. Celebrate the joy of the miracle of adoption in your home tonight. Whether in the form of a tickle fest or a shared bowl of ice cream. Remember to hold your miracles tightly and give them an extra squeeze from me.

*Even if you are not an adoptive parent but just a parent of an amazing child who was brought to you in a different way other than adoption please follow the above suggestion for tonight’s activities.

Learning to handle the many moods and activities of life requires solitude.
Do not let the demands of an overly active world rob your children of their peace.
Constant stimulation without balance of quietness creates chaos.
The child who early befriends solitude becomes one with all that is and inherits everything.

First you must embrace solitude in your own life.
It is more difficult than you think.
Distractions are everywhere.
Even the mind is noisy.

Give your children time to play without agenda, to read without purpose, to daydream without limits, and discover without fear.
Allow yourself the same.

This excerpt is from the book The Parent’s Tao Te Ching by William Martin.

I have been too wrapped up in things lately. I need to calm my mind more. I feel like I have forgotten how to relax and that is sad. I am so very busy with the demands of wife, mother and friend that I don’t take time for just me. I need to model this far more. I want my children to know how to give themselves down time.

For me this doesn’t mean I need to go to the spa or go shopping by myself those are things that would be nice but wouldn’t bring me solitude my life lacks. In fact those things would just bring one more rush to the already rushed life.

What does it mean to me? A year after my initial post I am still feeling frazzled and I am preoccupied with matters that don’t matter. This tells me I have yet to learn this lesson.

Is it this time of year? Yes, and no. I think that this time of year brings a slew of hurried activities and makes me crazy but I think I am like this all year. It is hard to quiet the mind. The 12 days between Annie and Kimberly’s birthday always take their toll. They are some of the most wonderful times, celebrating my two oldest children, but they are chaotic and crazy there is no way around them.

Since the Girls have entered school I have noticed each of them feeling more like they need me to entertain them. They are already losing that wandering spirit that their childhoods afforded them. They too will one day battle the balance much like I am. Hopefully I will have finally figured it out and can help them.

So I’m the primary caregiver for the time being. I will spare you, dear reader, the trite statements about how I can’t believe how much work it is or the heightened respect I have for Sandi after this. It is inevitable that living someone else’s life will garner a greater awareness of their troubles and triumphs. But that’s been done to death: it’s a fairly common trope in film and television.

I am fine with caring for four children for days at a time. But I get annoyed at how I’m expected to not be able to handle it or lauded for taking such an active role. Like this writer, people have called it “babysitting” and I get a lot of comments when I’m out running errands with them. For me, it’s all just “parenting.” As a parent, I should be able to switch roles with Sandi on a dime—pinch-hitting for her whenever necessary. I certainly don’t expect accolades for such facility.

In the end, though, all of these insensitivities mean nothing. The important thing is that I get to spend four days just enjoying the kids, missing the love of my life, and then getting her back happier and better than ever. That’s what life is all about.

On our anniversary we crossed another off. Here we are at Sunset Point before sunset. Bill didn’t want to allow a tourist to use his iPhone so we had to take the pic ourselves. Thankfully he has long arms. Unfortunately it was a cloudy evening so the sunset wasn’t as stunning as it could have been. All in all it was a nice date.

7 items officially crossed off the list, 10 others that are being done currently but are in progress things (i.e. remain passionate with Bill) so I am not crossing them off unless I get there and they are complete.

16 years ago on this day I married my soulmate.

I wasn’t looking for him when I found him, but I am sure glad I did. Our life together has bordered along the lines of too good to be true, thankfully it is all true.

1. I wanted to be President when I was a little girl. Now I would NEVER do it. It wouldn’t suit my family or myself.

2. I have never been skinny in my adult life and I have a very high self esteem. Not sure why people think that fat people have low self esteem.

3. I never kill spiders or bugs. I cannot stop a beating heart or whatever they have. I will do this to save my children from something but generally I live and let live.

4. I am deathly afraid of frogs. I will hyperventilate when I see them and they make me weak in the knees. I still won’t kill them but I can’t have them near me. I almost passed out this past year when there was one in my pool.

5. I cannot stand weak people. I mean I actually cannot stand to be around them. They. Really. Bother. Me.

6. I never thought I would be a stay at home mom. I was far too much of a feminist for this sort of life. Then I had kids and knew I had to refine my feminist beliefs.

7. I love to drive fast. Although this one goes to Bill’s head and he drives fast and swerves in and out of traffic which is just stupid.

8. I hate baby showers, they make me feel inferior and I don’t enjoy them. If I have been to your baby shower consider yourself really loved because I don’t do it for everyone. I don’t even enjoy my own showers.

9. I love Walmart.

10. I love to eat ice cream from the carton and drink juice from the jug.

11. I won’t drink anything you can’t see through, except for actual milk and I don’t drink that all that often.

12. I always have to have a creative outlet.

13. I hate my carpet.

14. I am in serious denial over how old I actually am. I feel much younger and have to calculate how old I am when people ask me. I always forget a couple of years.

15. I married my high school sweetheart and we didn’t even go to the same high school.

16. I love to read children’s literature. I love it far more than adult fiction.

17. I cannot stand pretentious or fake people.

18. When Bill clips his toenails or nail in my presence it make me want to divorce him.

19. I have always wanted to work at a movie theatre. Interesting because I really don’t enjoy going to the movies all that much.

20. I love to rub my lips on my babies hair. I did this with all of them while rocking them.

21. If I had all the money in the world I would continue to live my life the way I do. I would probably drive a Audi Q7 or a BMW X5 though and take more vacations.

22. I love to see the delight in my children’s faces when they are happy.

23. I love Littlest Pet Shops and am constantly tempted to buy every single one for my kids (and me of course).

24. I love the ocean. It is so calming to me.

25. I am afraid of space. The vastness of it blows my mind and makes me very nervous, like I could get lost and never found.

We fought long and hard for this family. The road was never easy and looking back over it was full of potholes and dead ends—I can happily say that I am glad I took that road. It is the one that brought me Kimberly, the child that taught me that there is good in the world and that people still do unimaginable things for others; Annie, the child that taught me that miracles can and do happen; Madeline, who came along and taught me that you can be a whole lot stronger than you ever imagined and that you can have more than one miracle in a lifetime; and of course Paul who has taught me that you must follow your heart even if it leads you half a world away.

Since we have brought Paul home we have been told by so many that we are saints, angels, etc., that God should bless us for doing this and how noble we are to take this on. I just nod and walk on by but really I want to scream and tell them that this isn’t about an altruistic motive. Besides God was blessing our family far before this addition and He will continue to in the future.

You may be wondering why this bothers me so. Well, the reason is because my kids hear it. My older girls are beginning to understand the world and less and less adult conversation goes over their heads. I don’t want them to feel like they are less important, just because I didn’t travel the world to get them. I would have if I had needed to.

Our family is made up of children who came to us in so many different ways, each one just as special as the other.

So to all those people out there who stop me daily to tell me what a great human I am for adopting Paul, leave the adopting Paul part out and you would have it just fine.

Hopefully in 30 days it will just be me, myself and I sitting here writing entries.

I know that many of our readers live in interesting towns with tons to do in them. We are looking for great new experiences for our family. It can include parks, museums and attractions. Please also give your normal weather for July. It should be around 110-120 here so we may be enticed by cooler climates.

So tell us where we should take our vacation and you may see the 6Browns in a town near you.

Thursday went well. I was able to get the Valentine dresses done that I wanted to. They look so cute! I am listing them in my etsy store if anyone is interested in having one of their own.


The break from the internet was good. I made the mistake of checking my mail from my palm in the middle of the day and it made me think more and more about the internet. Next week I won’t be checking that either. It just made me become preoccupied with everything internet. There were some court passings! Congratulations to all the families who passed court yesterday! I love knowing that those sweet children I met in Ethiopia are going home.

I was able to think clearly and I really enjoyed that. I know that next week will be even better because I was suffering from the side effects of the drugs this week and not on my A game.

Last week I evaluated each day of my week to figure out which day would be best for this sort of thing and I think that Thursday is going to be my best bet. So, tonight when I go to bed I intend to shut down my computer completely, I will still take phone calls tomorrow (unless later I find that I am receiving too many), but I will really seek to minimize my distractions. There are so many things that I want to achieve and do in this life that I tend to miss out on because the internet is so easy to pop onto and several hours are gone quickly.

I want to see if I can achieve that peace I had there. Life is so full and so busy and while I really enjoy that, going to Ethiopia showed me another way that I enjoy as well. I couldn’t go that direction all the time. I love the internet community and the time I spend online, it is a great part of my life. I need to find a balance and I think that this will force me to do it.

My life has been so amazing so far. I have done more than I thought I could and achieved things that were starry eyed little girl dreams. I have stood in the face of serious issues and been far stronger than I ever dreamed possible. I have survived infertility and have the family of six that I always dreamed of. Life isn’t always beautiful but it sure is a wonderful ride.

As the new year begins I am reflecting on the things I have done over the past year. I have looked over last years resolutions and I am proud to say that I achieved each and every one of them. I have grown to listen more fully to what I want and work towards those ends. I continue to educate the girls and found the most divine preschool for them to attend. I have enjoyed all the simple moments in my life. I finished the dossier, met my son and welcomed him into his family. And although it is not clear to others around me I have organized things a lot more than they were before, I am continually finding ways to streamline things.

As I look to this new year I have more things I want to work on perfecting.
1. Being more positive in my relationship to Bill
2. Parent the children in a more positive manner
3. Continue to organize and keep the family on track
4. Continue to enjoy and cherish the simple moments in life

Really overall this year the theme will be positivity. I feel like I need to be much more positive. I have such high standards and I think that I weigh my family down with them. Not get rid of my high standards but find more gentle ways to achieve them.

I also want to make time to learn to cook more. I am the kind of cook who can whip something up out of basics, but I want to be the cook that can make a meal that will knock your socks off. I plan to buy a new cookbook each month and concentrate on the recipes within it. I think that this will give me a more complete culinary stock to select from when cooking.

I want to thank you for your presence here and in our lives in 2008. Your kindness, support and encouragement have meant so very much to me, and I thank you for taking the moments out of your days to stop by this space. It’s an honor and a joy to share the journey with you!

Ethiopia is a very special place to me and one I look back on fondly. I want to be able to share this great country with others, since most people will not make it to that remote corner of the world. There were things I saw that I will never forget. Images that haunt me to this day and probably will for some time. They are all things that I want to share.

I will continue to share my stories and hope that people can see the love and affection through the hard stories. That is how I remember Ethiopia, love through the rough edges.

Grown up Christmas list by Amy Grant – love this one, it is simple and speaks to the things that we want but cannot buy.

The Chipmunk song by the Chipmunks – still love it. Still listen to the Echo Harmonica story every year.

Wonderful Christmas Time – great Christmas song you can dance to. Love the sentiment of it and that it doesn’t have to say much to say it all.

Breath of Heaven by Amy Grant – this is such a moving song. It gives me a glimmer of how daunting that moment must have been for Mary, how much faith she had to have to get her through that.

Christmas to Remember by Kenny and Dolly – I love love love this one. I always joke with Bill that it isn’t Christmas until Kenny and Dolly say so. He generally rolls my eyes at me and I go on singing this song.

Christmas song by anyone – such a timeless song.

Mary’s boy child – love the melody

Rocking around the Christmas tree – fun, fun, fun

I am sure there are others I love as well and as I figure them out I will post them.

I don’t have many dislikes but these are the songs that will have me running to change the channel.
Last Christmas by Wham
Santa baby – just not a holiday song I want to sing
Blue Christmas by Elvis – creeps me out a bit
Dummer boy – I just don’t enjoy the rum-pa-pu-pum
12 days of Christmas – talk about repetitive lyrics

Today as we were opening up our Christmas cards we got one from our friends up in Idaho. The girls really missed seeing their friends Christa and Cassidy and Baby Jack (who isn’t much of a baby anymore.) Hopefully we will be able to meet them in California this spring.